Winnipeg ~ too small/small enough ?

Oh my Winnipeg, I do love you. Mind you I can escape your heavily roped restraints anytime I need. And I do need that flight from home turf.

I chose to stay on the edges, never immersing myself too heavily in a scene where I would then become known. Where the same faces floated about you, old interactions and remembered histories clashing with desire for open clean slates. Chose is not a complete story though. Continuous uprooting meant I didn't settled down for long in a space, leaving town and friendships, schools, groups. Rotating into orbits for a time. A time of discovery, of exploring who I was through new friends and the people around me. 

And I missed, of course, walking into a room knowing tons of people. 

But I didn't. And was enjoying relative anonymity. 

Met fleeing this strangling city this fall an experimental filmmaker, complete in bitter loathing for a city that didn't provide him opportunities or recognize him while York University offered full scholarship for his film master, plus chance to teach and work with idols. I argued Winnipeg provided a good place for lots of artists, those who preferred toiling in obscurity and that we foster a great arts/music scene.  Clearly, not for all. For some the scene is incestually small, adult interactions high school reminiscent. 

And my place became clearer still - though I enjoy knowing people I really enjoy being on the fringes... and not knowing everyone. Because as soon as that happens every action becomes noticed. logged to be judged, somehow, later on. 

Going to a show this Friday brought it out. I get to the Pyramid often enough and usually it's packed, though that also tends to be the shows I choose. This was a local show, 60s spy themed. Not too busy, though the music was great and introduced me to superb local group This Hisses. 

Wow! strands of Portishead and Radiohead, rock surf noir. J'adore. Will be out to see them again. And I knew I remembered one of the members from another lifetime at the Red Herring when we were briefly friends. those who spent late nineties nights hanging out there will know. And I knew the singer of the Rockdoras too. Saw some regular scene faces and even the unrecognizable shared quick histories and one degree separation. Shared partners from the past? Too convenient.

What made this too much, almost too much closeness in Winnipeg, is that I haven't been around this scene in nearly twelve years. And still had way too many connections and recognizables around me.

Next time I search a facebook event instead of checking how many people I know going and sending invites, I'll look for the most anonymous of events. Within the same small list of interesting goings-on... wish me luck!